They joke that the dream of all girls is to be a dream girl. This is only partly a joke, because almost everyone tries to turn their heads to men with a languid gaze and conquer them forever.
On the net you will find millions of recommendations regarding the phenomenon of creating an indelible first impression. But how to choose those that are really useful from the whole kaleidoscope of tips for conquering the male heart. After all, sometimes, you can only do harm with your excessive zeal and all efforts will be in vain.
Appearance and first impression
Often, tips on how to please a man affect only the female appearance and are superficial. Like, do a hairstyle, make-up, dress a dress, hairpins and a hat thing. However, no matter how. Yes, you will certainly attract attention, but is there anyone you need ?! All passers-by will look back at you, but it refers only to a doll. And why are often often inconspicuous, discreet girls so desirable, loved and attractive?
Of course, the first thing a man pays attention to is your appearance. Most of all, men like accuracy and naturalness, good taste and elegance, elusive charm and, of course, some zest. Why ideal at first glance girls can be left without due attention? It's simple, because often they are similar to each other, like two drops of water, they do not have that breath of fresh air that any man needs so much. There is no individual and special, there is a template, standard and scheme ... Not very romantic, so men rather prefer not so ideal, but interesting and “lively” types.
Non-verbal communication
Non-verbal communication is the second most important determining criterion in the phenomenon of “first impression”. Your way of behaving, moving, your gait and posture, facial expressions and gaze - all this either plays to your advantage in the matter of seduction or not. 55 percent of all information a man “reads” through your alluring or timid smile, through a confident or shy look, insinuating or disturbing voice.
All efforts to take control of your body and face and behave, as it is written in the textbook of seduction, trying on images that are unusual for nature (a fatal seductress, nymphet or timid modesty) can interfere with making not only the right impression about you, but simply pleasant. The theatricality, sometimes reaching the point of comic, repels men very much, while naturalness and immediacy in behavior entail like a magnet.
Need to be, not seem
Your internal state is the key to success at the first contact. If it freely comes out (the principle of congruency) a man is quickly saturated with a feeling of sympathy and trust. If you feel good at heart, you are disposed to communication and flirting, you are open and friendly, then you will certainly make a positive impression.
It is important to honestly answer your question, why do you need this communication, what do you want to get from him. If the purpose of communication is reduced to intimacy, going to restaurants, receiving gifts - it’s better to tell the man directly (“Are we pretty to each other, who are we staying with today?”). Such honesty and openness is very attractive to those men who are ready to accept such rules of the game.
Sincere interest in a man
When a woman shows sincere interest in a man, asks interesting questions, carefully listens to his answers, maybe even admires him, the man melts. Sincere respect for the personality of a man, his sphere of activity, his hobby give 100 points of attractiveness to a woman in the eyes of a man flattered by her.
Try to never fool the interlocutor or yourself with a pretense of interest. Take the trouble to ask yourself the question, do I really need and are interested in whether I like him. You do not need to evaluate it in terms of its status and efficiency, reliability, just feel what feelings it evokes in the subtle plane. We go further: what will you feel next to him after 20 years of marriage ... dream, do not be afraid! And when you understand that you feel a response in your soul, you will intuitively behave in a way that will please him.
First impression is a matter of seconds
It only takes a few seconds for the first impression to form, it takes a minute to consolidate it, and it will last quite a long time. The echoes of the first impression will disappear only when you get to know each other very closely and get to know each other for real. The first seconds of acquaintance decide the fate of all further relationships.
Come from childhood
Even in childhood, ideas were laid in us about how an ideal man should be, how he should behave, what to wear, what to smell. And then at a meeting with lightning speed (a few seconds) the partner is diagnosed by the criterion suitable - not suitable. Then a verdict is issued. We unconsciously adjust a person to the criteria of conformity or non-conformity, and then, in the process of living together, we learn his present. The image created during the acquaintance disappears under the pressure of bustling everyday life, love also melts and there is no trace of the created image.
Therefore, the main thing in meeting you is not to be deceived. It is important to be honest with yourself and listen to the voice from the inside, because everyone knows in reality what will come of this or that acquaintance. Communication will succeed if people initially show themselves to be real and their expectations from these relationships. These expectations and desires are not always voiced, they can only be read in the behavior and communication of the partner, but an attentive and thoughtful person will understand and accept them. There is no need to follow the lines of society, considering each man as a potential lover and husband. Listen to yourself and do not waste your time on those who are unpleasant to you. A man will also feel, if you are not disposed to communicate, no matter how hard you try to deceive him, pretending to smile and nod. He will certainly feel his insignificant value in your eyes. Be honest with yourself and the man, then you can make a good first impression.
Are we stepping on the same rake again?
Each of us can have a stereotype regarding men (“All men are the same, they only need one”; “Men are unreliable, they cannot be trusted” “Men are greedy and lazy”). They are buried in the subconscious of a woman and shape her behavior with men. On the one hand, she wants to build relationships, and on the other hand, she has negative attitudes that impede normal communication. Such programs operate automatically: a man really begins to show greed or indifference to a woman with negative attitudes.
If you begin to act from the opposite: to praise, give thanks and inspire, then the man will want to do much more. Paid in a cafe - “How generous you are!” Gave flowers - “How nice I am!” A man can turn mountains for warm words of gratitude! But thoughts like “Yeah, but the restaurant is seedy” or “Yesterday’s bouquet and some too small!” Will give rise to only one desire in a man - never to see you again. An unconscious image, pressing on a man, adjusts his behavior towards your thoughts and attitudes. So think about the man well, and he will behave with you accordingly.
Do not do this on your first date:
1. Underestimation of a man’s own value and value. This is a very common mistake when girls interrupt, as much as they choke, deny their positive qualities: "What are you, I'm not so beautiful, smart, talented ...". It is important to learn to take compliments and courtship with dignity and confidence. And it’s better to talk about a man well too, try to give a sincere compliment (oh, how much they love them, sometimes more girls).
2. Presentation of high expectations from the situation and from the man. Extreme expectations spoil the first acquaintance. They repel and suggest: "Why is it that I suddenly owe you something?"
3. “Burden” with their difficulties of life. Do not tell the poor man about your problems with parents, relatives and acquaintances. Even if it does not concern you directly, all the negative voiced will be associated with a new acquaintance with you.
